Trying to remember that great little speech you heard at the CAP Parent Meeting? The one you're supposed to give the kids in front of the babysitter? Here it is:
Before you leave your children with a sitter for the night, avoid saying "Now listen up, the babysitter is the boss. If I find out that you misbehaved while we were gone, you're in big trouble." While it's perfectly reasonable to expect your children to follow rules, you don't want give someone watching your children more power than they need. If your children perceive their sitter to have boundless authority over them, they will be more vulnerable to being manipulated by that person.
In order to tell your kids that you expect them to behave, while simultaneously empowering them to protect their rights, we recommend phrasing your message like this:
"Now I know you're going to do a really good job following the family rules tonight, and if anything happens that makes you feel sad, scared, or unsafe, that's the first thing we're going to talk about when I get back." By saying this to your children in front of the babysitter, you let your kids know what is expected of them, while letting the sitter know that you are paying attention and your children will tell you if anything weird happens while you're out. This speech isn't just for babysitters; it can be used in front of coaches, teachers, relatives, etc. Anyone who will be alone with your child for an extended period of time.
